For me the most hard hitting point of the entire book was when the girls were being so vile to each other….over a guy. Now I’m not saying this doesn’t happen, girls are vile to each other over all manner of things. A practice I really wish we would stop. But the fact that they were trying so hard to legitimately traumatize Rachel, over a man that had no interest in them was honestly horrific.
Now I am not from a rich family. I was raised in a very comfortable childhood. Things were not perfect, there was no over excessive abundance of money. But we lived very comfortably. As an adult with some seriously crushing student debt trying to survive in Los Angeles of all places while supporting my own tiny family unit, I have come to realize just how comfortable my childhood was.
This is why to me these girls were being absolutely ridiculous. I wanted their mothers to show up and slap them. I was raised to be an independent, I was raised to focus on my education, on myself, on my own success. These girls were not.
When I graduated college I sat my mom down and told her that I was planning on living at home for another year or two as I had done through college, but at that point I would either move out or start paying rent. I did this because I was raised to know that life was not going to be a free ride for me. It was not a bad conversation, it was initiated by me, because I knew it was an arrangement that needed to be talked about. These girls are grown women, graduated from college and still living off of their family's money.
Please do not misunderstand, if you have the means to support your children in such a way, then it is your right and it doesn’t make you a bad parent. I have received help from my parents since moving out on my own. There is no shame in trying to give your child every advantage. However, and this is a big however, these girls never had to do a thing for themselves, and that I do feel is a problem, they are entitled, and they are desperate, desperate to make their family see their value. They were raised to be the bridge between their wealthy family and another and to them it is a failure until they do so.
For girls like me, for girls like Rachel, we were never raised with a specific purpose in furthering our family’s success beyond that of doing the best in our careers. My family does not judge my success based on who I am married to. They love my husband for who he is, they love me for who I am, they are proud of me for my career and my son.
What must it feel like to have that kind of pressure. The kind of pressure that unlike my own upbringing where my mother would not have stood for me pulling any of the shit these girls pulled, were actually put up to it by their mothers. It’s twisted. I feel sorry for those girls. I feel sorry for Rachel who was never given a chance to be judged as her own person, only as the girl in the way of all these rich people’s plans.
As a whole the novel was absolutely hilarious. In part for me because I am so far removed from that kind of wealth that it seems comical the kind of pressure they put on marriages, and impressing people. But the message I found underneath did break my heart, that for some, it doesn’t matter who you love, it doesn’t matter what you want out of life, it’s either you sacrifice what you want or you sacrifice your family. The ending, Rachel's reaction to the whole affair, had me pumping my fist in the air so proud of her. I won't say more, I don't want to spoil it, but it was amazing.
“Crazy Rich Asians” by Kevin Kwan
https://www.google.com/books/edition/Crazy_Rich_Asians/LrFYL6NFjU8C?hl=en&gbpv=0
Now I am not from a rich family. I was raised in a very comfortable childhood. Things were not perfect, there was no over excessive abundance of money. But we lived very comfortably. As an adult with some seriously crushing student debt trying to survive in Los Angeles of all places while supporting my own tiny family unit, I have come to realize just how comfortable my childhood was.
This is why to me these girls were being absolutely ridiculous. I wanted their mothers to show up and slap them. I was raised to be an independent, I was raised to focus on my education, on myself, on my own success. These girls were not.
When I graduated college I sat my mom down and told her that I was planning on living at home for another year or two as I had done through college, but at that point I would either move out or start paying rent. I did this because I was raised to know that life was not going to be a free ride for me. It was not a bad conversation, it was initiated by me, because I knew it was an arrangement that needed to be talked about. These girls are grown women, graduated from college and still living off of their family's money.
Please do not misunderstand, if you have the means to support your children in such a way, then it is your right and it doesn’t make you a bad parent. I have received help from my parents since moving out on my own. There is no shame in trying to give your child every advantage. However, and this is a big however, these girls never had to do a thing for themselves, and that I do feel is a problem, they are entitled, and they are desperate, desperate to make their family see their value. They were raised to be the bridge between their wealthy family and another and to them it is a failure until they do so.
For girls like me, for girls like Rachel, we were never raised with a specific purpose in furthering our family’s success beyond that of doing the best in our careers. My family does not judge my success based on who I am married to. They love my husband for who he is, they love me for who I am, they are proud of me for my career and my son.
What must it feel like to have that kind of pressure. The kind of pressure that unlike my own upbringing where my mother would not have stood for me pulling any of the shit these girls pulled, were actually put up to it by their mothers. It’s twisted. I feel sorry for those girls. I feel sorry for Rachel who was never given a chance to be judged as her own person, only as the girl in the way of all these rich people’s plans.
As a whole the novel was absolutely hilarious. In part for me because I am so far removed from that kind of wealth that it seems comical the kind of pressure they put on marriages, and impressing people. But the message I found underneath did break my heart, that for some, it doesn’t matter who you love, it doesn’t matter what you want out of life, it’s either you sacrifice what you want or you sacrifice your family. The ending, Rachel's reaction to the whole affair, had me pumping my fist in the air so proud of her. I won't say more, I don't want to spoil it, but it was amazing.
“Crazy Rich Asians” by Kevin Kwan
https://www.google.com/books/edition/Crazy_Rich_Asians/LrFYL6NFjU8C?hl=en&gbpv=0
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